WHY DO I OVERTHINK EVERYTHING? — WORKSHEET
TATA, Your Adaptation Voice · Social Threat, Cognitive Load & Mental Scanning
Eight exercises to help you find out which monitors your guard is actually watching, and start giving her real evidence instead of more hypotheticals to chase.
1. STAFF THE GUARD STATION
Instructions: List three things TATA has been scanning for lately, the worries running quietly in the background of your day. Write them exactly as they show up in your head, not the polished version.
EXAMPLE: Monitor 1: Whether my coworker's short reply meant something.
Monitor 2: Whether I talked too much at dinner last night.
Monitor 1:
Monitor 2:
Monitor 3:
2. THE THREAT-OR-ASSUMED CHECK
Instructions: Pick one spiral from this week. Write the actual moment, then write what TATA added on top of it, then ask yourself honestly which one you actually have evidence for.
EXAMPLE: The actual moment: My friend didn't text back for six hours.
What TATA added: "She's upset with me and doesn't want to talk to me anymore."
What I actually have evidence for: That she's busy; she's mentioned a packed week twice already.
The actual moment:
What TATA added on top:
What I actually have evidence for:
3. WHERE THE GUARD WAS HIRED
Instructions: Think back to a time growing up when scanning for a problem early actually kept you safer. Write what that situation was, and what you learned to start watching for because of it.
EXAMPLE: The situation: I could tell within seconds of walking in whether it was a good night or a bad one.
What I learned to watch for: Tone of voice, how hard a door closed, whether someone answered me right away.
The situation:
What I learned to watch for:
4. CIRCLE ONE
Instructions: When a spiral kicks in, which one do you usually reach for first?
CHASE CERTAINTY / FORCE IT OUT / BOTH, IN THAT ORDER
Write one sentence about what that option actually costs you:
5. THE ONE-SENTENCE DOWNLOAD
Instructions: Next time a thought is looping, write it down in exactly one sentence, no explaining, no fixing. Then answer the two questions below.
EXAMPLE: The looping thought, in one sentence: "I think I said something weird at lunch and now everyone thinks I'm awkward."
Does this need solving right now? No, not right now.
When can I actually check on it, if it still matters? Tomorrow, if it's still on my mind.
The looping thought, in one sentence:
Does this need solving right now?
When can I actually check on it, if it still matters?
6. THE HANDS-BUSY EXPERIMENT
Instructions: Next time you notice the scan running, do a task that needs both hands for two full minutes; dishes, folding laundry, stacking something. Afterward, write down what happened to the volume of the spiral.
What I did with my hands:
What happened to the spiral while my hands were busy:
Did it come back once I stopped? How loud was it this time?
7. REWRITE THE JOB DESCRIPTION
Instructions: Write the old job description you gave your guard, the belief that convinced her she has to watch everything. Then write a new, smaller job description based on what you actually need her to do now.
EXAMPLE: Old job description: "Watch everything, all the time, or something will get past me."
New job description: "Flag anything urgent. Everything else can wait for the morning check-in."
Old job description:
New job description:
8. WEEKLY SCAN CHECK-IN
Instructions: At the end of the week, come back to this page. Circle how many monitors your guard was running most days, then write one honest sentence about it.
ONE OR TWO / A HANDFUL / THE WHOLE WALL / FEWER THAN LAST WEEK
One honest sentence about it:
You got this! Nobody is coming to save you… you have to save yourself!